Abiding Hope Collages

From Franchesca Cox. Here wonderful work has been added to WTRLA's website and I thank her for doing Sophia's name for me. I think it is beautiful.

Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope

A few days ago I submitted my story for a new website called Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope. They are a group of women that collect mothers stories that have loss a child or children.

Today my story was published. Thought I know my story it still felt so nice to read it and to know it is there for other mothers to read. I think it will also be a great way for people to read about the walk.

So if you care to read my store of loss here it is:

http://www.facesofloss.com/2010/08/cassie-mom-to-sophia-rene-died-march.html#more

Moose Lake Provincial Park in Alberta

Sophia Rene at Moose Lake Provincial Park in Alberta

I got this email today from Sherry. She was thinking of Sophia from Canada. Thank you so much Sherry, this totally made my day.

Sophia in Sanibel Beach, Florida

Sophia in Sanibel Beach, Florida

Sophia's name in Florida is from April. She is another one of my CTT friends. Thank you so much April.

Sophia's Name on The Sidewalk

Sophia Rene by Names In The Sidewalk

Thank you Tiffany Lopez. She is the founder of Names On The Sidewalk. She does her work here in Los Angeles. It is nice to have one so close to home. This is so special. To me this picture depicts the innocence of childhood. I think it is wonderful and I love all the colors. Tiffany's blog is: http://namesonthesidewalk.blogspot.com/ If you have a moment please check out her work.

Thank you Tiffany for a wonderful July 4th gift.

Sophia's Ears

Tonight I went to Disneyland ALONE. I watched fireworks, I rode Matterhorn as a single rider, which was great all of a 5 minute wait in line. I rode Thunder Mt. I watch Fantasmic. I enjoyed myself alone. Then I did one thing I have been meaning to do for over a year now.

I got Sophia's Mickey Ears. When I went into the hat shop on Main Street to get the ears I did not know how the world of Mickey Ears has changed so much. In 2008 when we got Mya hers we grabbed the toddler size had them stitch "Mya" and we were on our way. This was not the case tonight. They have interchangeable ears, different text, patches, ect, ect. So I had to ask an employee for help. She asked me what I was looking for I told her Pink Mickey Ear. I need my daughter name on that. She asked me the one question I was not ready for, "Oh where is your daughter?" My answer was she passed away. I did not know what to say.

So after all that I was walking out of the park and saw a nice family was trying to take a family picture. I asked the mother if she wanted me to do it. Their baby was asleep in the baby bjourn and she said they were from Arizona so I thought they should have a family picture. Right when she gave me the camera my cell phone dropped. They first thing out of her mouth was....I hope it is not broken. I told her I am sure it is fine. My 2 year old drops it all the time. I took the picture was on my way.

I got to the tram to snap this picture and sure enough my phone was broken. It is OK. I am happy I got this picture and I enjoyed most of the night tonight.

I plan one day on getting a picture of Mya with her ears and Sophia's ears next to Mya. I saw a picture of this on Bring the Rain http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/ and I knew I wanted a picture like this. So here is the start to that picture.

Sophia at Sea World

A Sophia coffee cup from Sea World, San Diego

From Shannon. I love this one because my in-laws have pet names for Eddie and I. He is Brown Bear and I am Polar Bear. While I was pregnant the girls were our Panda Bears. And to this day anytime I see something with a Panda Bear on it I get it for Mya.

Thank you Shannon for thinking of Sophia and I.

Sophia at Great Pyramids of Giz, in Egypt

Great Pyramids of Giz, in Egypt

First let me say this is the best 30th birthday gift I got today. This is from a wonderful online friend Shey. Her story of her daughter Whitney is such a powerful one. She blogs at: www.whitneyjill.com I suggest if you have a moment stop by there.

I wanted to share some of what Shey shared in her email to me:

"There is an Egyptian saying that is carved on the walls of many of the royals' tombs that says "to speak the name of the dead is to make them live again." I hope by sending you this picture and knowing that you and your little one were thought of and that I prayed for you and your heart specifically, you will find some comfort and joy today."

Thank you so much Shey. Can't wait to see you in October.

FINALLY!!!!!!!!!

Guess what I got today in the mail?

That is right we are now incorporated. This afternoon I will get my EIN from the IRS and now we can start moving forward.

I thought this would never happen. There is still so much work to be done. We have to keep the ball rolling.

Now we need to find a park. I am starting to give up on the City of Long Beach and they keep telling me they are going to get it approved this week and week after week I hear nothing.

In A Holding Pattern.

I feel like I am in a holding pattern. STS paid to have Walk to Remember, Los Angeles incorporated. It was supose to take a week. It has been over 2 weeks. But my hands are tied. Our "great state" is not in good shape right now.

In other news. I have submitted paperwork to the City of Long Beach to have our walk there. I really like Long Beach. I feel it is an iconic place in LA County. So if all goes well we will have our walk in Long Beach.

Also I have purchased a website. So as soon as construction is done www.walktorememberla.org will be up and running. So far Facebook has been a great tool for networking. I have been in contact with several websites to add their content to the site. I am not a very web savy person but I will figure it out. I have to thank Jami and Anthony Delgado for their help.

The Start of Great Things.

I have been thinking about things a lot lately. After a few conversations with my boss Paul I have decided to start a non-profit organization. Right now the paperwork is in the state's hands to form Walk to Remember, Los Angeles.

I have been in contact with a great group in the Inland Empire. They too will be having their first walk in October. If all goes well we will be having our First Annual Walk to Remember, Los Angeles on October 9, 2010. Amanda and Sarah are great I look forward to working with them in the future as we are all working for the same thing. To help fa miles who have lost a child during pregnancy or infancy

I truly feel that Los Angeles County should have an organization for families. The goal is to have a 5k in October then to also have a picnic in May for International Baby Loss Mothers Day.

So these are my plans for now. Here is to me getting the ball rolling. I have a lot of work a head of me.

The Midnight Orange

Look what I have coming: While browsing one of my favorite sites ETSY I came across The Midnight Orange. I sent her a request explaining my unique story. So here is what she came up with. I think it is perfect. I can't wait until it arrives. This was a pleasant email while working on a Saturday afternoon.

A Special Email From Carly

When I got Sophia's name in the sand I ordered the JPEG so I could print it. I never got it. So I emailed Carly. So today I got my photo file and she wrote Sophia's name again for me. I love them both, they are so nice and I love that I have these in places I can think about Sophia all the time.

OC Walk To Remember

Last month while on Babycenter I saw that October 15th is the day of remembrance for pregnancy and infancy loss. So I signed up.

This morning Mya and I went to UC Irvine for the 5th Annual OC Walk to Remember. It was a cool morning so that made for a good walk. When Mya and I arrived I registered. Then I fed Mya breakfast in her stroller as I could not find any place to sit.

The memorial ceremony was so pretty I am so happy I attended and plan on attending next year. I think this was a wonderful way to reflect on Sophia. I think it is rather important for Mya to know about Sophia and to know that she is a twin.

I have struggled since finding out Sophia diagnosis how we will tell Mya about Sophia. First I though when she got her first dolly we would name her Sophia. Now after attending today's walk I hope to attend more events like this one and at the hospital to show Mya that Sophia was a very important part of my life and hers. I still stay if it was not for Sophia fighting as long as she did I may not even have Mya. And I thank Sophia for Mya every day of my life.

To Write Their Names In The Sand

I have found this great blog. http://namesinthesand.blogspot.com/search?q=Sophia+Rene What Carly does is simply amazing. She is in Australia. I had put together a collage of photos of Eddie and Mya for Father's Day and when I went to get my laptop I noticed today was Sophia's turn for her name. I had hoped I would have it by their birthday. I am happy it came the day after Mya's birthday party and before their actual birthday. I am so pleased it looks so pretty and I am so happy that I have it. I want to get it framed for my desk at work and find some place special in the house for it.

I have found out that collecting your child's name is a common thing among mothers who have lost a child. I think I may start joining them in collecting names. The feeling I got when I saw this picture was amazing. I feel that this picture describes Sophia's beauty so perfectly. I am crying as I sit here and look at it.