Just a few nights ago I had a thought. I was thinking how I had not heard of any other families that had lost. Though we have been through a few birthday's and anniversaries recently it did not seem like I had heard of any "newcomers" to our exclusive club that no one really wants to join yet all of our new friends we can count on for understanding are members.
Monday night in Long Beach I met the parents of "M". It broke my heart to hear her story. What a wanted and loved little girl she is. Tuesday was 1 month since her passing. Then today I get a text message from a very old friend of mine. She said a good friend of hers had lost her son and that thoughts and prayers needed to be sent to her. Her son was born premature. He was due in March, that was the only information I had.
So then I started thinking. Why would I allow myself to think such a thing. Now look. No matter how prepared you think you are for such a thing you are not. Now I kick myself for thinking this morbid thing.
I have told people when I tell them our story "I would not wish this on my worse enemy" yet this thought came across my mind.
Shame on me.