Monday, March 14, 2011

A Very Beautiful Way to Celebrate Our Sophia Rene

I appologize in advance. I have taken my time to write this post because I knew it would be hard.........

Through the time I have always spent March 11th remembering, celebrating and missing more than words can describe our precious Sophia Rene. As a family Eddie, Mya and I celebrated Sophia on Sunday, March 13, 2011.

After a marathon of work this week I made it through Friday with my boss telling me that he knew today was a day of memory and I should go home early. Early as in 7pm. This after he asked me other bosses why I had received flowers.

All and all the day was OK. I cried a couple times when I read Facebook posts or when someone would say something to me but the day was mainly peaceful, which is what I wanted.

I worked 16 hours on Saturday and got up early, time change and all to go see two clients on Sunday. Mya had spent the night a Alice & Eddie's on Saturday so I was able to get up and go quickly on Sunday which ment the quicker I got home to my family, the quicker we would have our family day.

When I arrived back home at noon I was greeted by a very happy toddler. We told her we were going to the beach and she immediately told me she needed to wear her Lady Bug "Kini" I told her OK under her clothes. She was happy with that. We packed in the car and were on our way. Mya was asleep before we were in Pasadena. So we stopped for Eddie's birthday taquitos at Cielito Lindo on Olvera Street. Eddie was a happy camper and we were on our way again.

When we arrived a the Redondo Beach Pier Mya had just woke up. She was very excited to see the beach. We walked around the pier a bit then we headed down to the beach. When we got to the beach I found the most perfect way to celebrate Sophia and all over her friends. My initial plan was to purchase a balloon and release it as I have never done that for Sophia personally. BUT they were having the Kite Festival. There were so many beautiful kites soaring above us. Just as there are so many beautiful children in heaven looking down on all of the loving mothers. I was so happy we decided to go to Redondo rather than Santa Monica, it was almost a sign.

All the kites soaring above instantly reminded me of Sophia and all of her friends. Each and every one.

I took Mya down to the water and watched her innocence of being the child she is and enjoyed every moment of it. As soon as she saw the water she wanted to take off her clothes and
be in her "Kini" but it was too chilly for that. As I played with her I wondered if Sophia was looking down at us happy that we were happy. Happy that her "little" sister was enjoying the beach as she has been telling us for the last couple months she wants to go to the beach.

After we were done playing we walked back up to the stroller and to clean our feet. As we were walking to clean our feet I noticed a perfect panda kite. I was so excited. It was a perfect way to end our trip to the beach, once again a perfect sign.

Though I was exhausted I was so happy we spent the afternoon, our little family. I personally enjoyed every moment of it and and happy with the way the weekend turned out. A perfect (for me) way to remember my precious little girl who three years ago we all said good bye to after putting up the fight of her life and giving it her all keep her "little" sister safe and bringing her to me to make my the most proud and loving mother I could ever be.

What Sophia has taught me about life I can not describe but I am so thankful to be the Mommy of two amazing little girls. I am so amazed how such a tiny little girl (15 ounces at birth) touched me personally in such a large way.

I love you Sophia.

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